Flirting is a natural behavior, and it's safe to say that the population wouldn't be nearly as big without it. It can either be fun or fearful - it all depends on how confident you feel in your abilities. Some say flirting is an art; here's how to be an artist.
Whether we do it with a smoldering glance or a knee-slapping one-liner, flirting is the vital first rung of the dating ladder. It is the all-important interaction that can make or break our chances to form a new relationship (no matter how casual that relationship may turn out to be). For some people, flirting comes as naturally as breathing; for others, it’s enough to take their breath away. Is there a secret to successful flirting? How can you be sure your flirting will get results?
First things first: look your best.
When you look great, you feel great. And when you feel great, you’re a better flirt. Almost anyone will tell you that self-confidence is a big turn-on, and when you look your personal best, your confidence level is likely at an all-time high. And obviously, people are more likely to be attracted to you if you’re well-groomed as opposed to stinky and straggly. Since flirting doesn’t necessarily have to happen on a big night out – it’s just as easy to flirt at the grocery store or library – this means looking as good as you can, all the time. Of course, it doesn’t hurt to make yourself especially presentable when you’re planning to be at a “high flirtation location” such as a bar or club. The extra time it takes you to get ready is a valuable investment.
Ooze confidence.
Even if you don’t feel particularly confident, nobody has to know that but you. You can project an air of confidence in a couple of ways: correct posture, for starters. Pull your shoulders back, your chin up, and straighten your back. You don’t have to look “forced” – most people don’t naturally sit ramrod-straight, and you’ll probably look strained if you do – just tidy up your normal posture a bit. Be more aware of the way you’re walking, the way you’re sitting, the way you’re carrying yourself in general. You may feel a little silly, but some practice at home couldn’t hurt, and pretty soon your new posture may be more natural to you than your old slumping self.
Another way to feign confidence is to make eye contact. It is a sign of openness. Nothing says “I’m uncomfortable” like refusing to meet someone’s eyes when they’re talking to you. Eye contact is also a great way to flirt from afar if you’re not ready to approach the person just yet (although your gaze could be so beguiling to them that they could approach you first). A surefire trick: look into your “target’s” eyes for a second or two, smile and look briefly away, and then look at them again. For the best results, repeat this throughout the evening so that the person will know for sure it’s them you’re flirting with. The trick here is to be fairly quick, though; if you look away for too long, the other party may assume you’ve lost interest and will look away themselves.