You’ve been going to church faithfully all your life, or at least all your children’s lives. In your home, you’ve established a strong belief system that you are sure will help your children to be thoroughly decent people and to live the best life possible. But, what if your son or daughter decides not to be an active participant in the family’s religion in adulthood? While this may be disappointing, there’s no need to panic—your child’s change in religion may be what’s best for everyone.

Don’t be so disapproving.

Even if you’re disappointed, upset, or confused, try not to continue showing your disapproval when your son or daughter tells you they’ve decided to try a new religion. Even though your child may already be an adult, you will still disconnect the line of communication if he or she thinks that you will disapprove of decisions you wouldn’t have made yourself. Make sure that you’re listening to the reasons why your child has chosen a different religious path, and ask as many questions as you need to—except for questions like “How could you do this to us?”, “What are you thinking?”, or “Do you really think that’s going to work?” Even if you think your son or daughter’s new religion choice is a little far-fetched, try to be understanding. And, if you feel that the religion change definitely wasn’t a well thought out decision, be sure to convey this in a loving way. This religion change (or giving up the faith) may just be a part of your son or daughter’s spiritual growth or healing process. But, whether or not they choose to participate in the family’s religion again, they’re always going to need your love and support—even when they’re doing something you wouldn’t necessarily do. Let your son or daughter know that you still believe he or she is a good person, and be sure to point out all the great qualities your child possesses. Let them know that you trust their judgment, and that you know they will make the right decision concerning their faith.