The beginning of the school year is a time for lots of changes and adjustments—your children may be nervous or anxious about making the switch from preschool to kindergarten, elementary to middle school, going from middle school to high school, or even going off to college. Because the new school year signifies a new milestone in your child’s life, he or she may opt to change their ‘look’ this year. This is probably fine in some cases, but it could be cause for alarm for many parents. Don’t quite know how to handle your daughter’s new hairstyle, or your son’s request for a tattoo? Here are some suggestions that may help.

Don’t panic.

One of the worst things you can do is lose your temper or get upset when your child comes to you and tells you that he or she wants to do something different fashion-wise for the new school year. The fact that your son or daughter trusts you enough to let you know that they’re thinking of changing their look is not something to be taken lightly, since every parent knows it can be extremely difficult to communicate with children, especially as they grow older. Instead of telling your child what’s wrong with his or her fashion idea(s), try to offer alternate suggestions instead.

For instance, if your daughter wants to dye her hair a new color that you don’t think is flattering (and, for the record, blue highlights don’t look good on anyone), you may want to suggest colors that will compliment her skin tone. You may even want to take her to a beauty salon for a consultation with a stylist; teenagers are much more likely to take advice from professionals. You can also arrange for a fashion consultant, or a friend or family member that you trust to help guide your daughter’s fashion choices for the year.

Let your child know that you encourage her self-exploration, and want her to look as beautiful as possible. You may even have to bend a little—if you don’t like the new clothes she’s bought for the year, try not to make a big deal out of it, unless the clothes are inappropriate for school. After all, we all go through fashion phases, and by the middle of the semester, she may be wearing something totally different.