According to Italian tradition, when a man wanted to ask for a woman’s hand in marriage either himself (or in some cases, his brother or another male relative) went to speak to the woman’s father. Once the father said yes and both families were fine with the arrangement, presents were then exchanged. It was customary for the prospective groom (the pretendente) to place a diamond ring on his bride-to-be’s finger before the engagement was announced.

Hope Chest for the Bride-To-Be

In readying herself for the upcoming nuptials, the bride-to-be collected a trousseau (or hope chest) of household items, clothing and sometimes even a few pieces of clothing belonging to her future husband. During the many wars fought in Italy, items in hope chests had to be carefully packed and then put away in excellent hiding places because it was feared that the soldiers from the invading army would find their way into homes and steal everything inside. Besides the hope chest, her family often gifted her with a dowry of monetary value and in some cases, domestic goods such as dishes and silverware.

Wedding Ceremonies in Churches

Italian weddings were always held in churches (sposarsi in chiesa) and certain traditions and folklore had to be abided by. Marriage during the season of Lent was not allowed, as was marriage during Advent. No wedding ceremonies were held in May because that month was set aside for the worship of the Virgin Mary. As well, marrying in the month of August was believed to invite bad luck and sickness. There was a practical reason for this also- many Italian citizens took their vacations in August and it was thought that there would be low attendance at weddings. All other months of the year were allowed for weddings. Most weddings were held on Sunday as it was considered the “luckiest day” for the bond of matrimony.