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What You Should Know Before Your Adult Children Return Home 
 
by Joanne Heck June 10, 2005

If your child is returning home there are some specific things you can do to make the adjustment easier and less stressful for everyone.

Over 80 million adult children who have left home have returned to live with their parents. They call them “boomerang kids.” Many return due to post college expenses and loans. Newly divorced adult children are facing economic hardships and returning home for financial reasons. Sometimes alcohol or drug problems drive our children home. There, of course, those adult children who return home to be taken care of. It’s easier to take the couch versus a job.

If your child is returning home there are some specific things you can do to make the adjustment easier and less stressful for everyone.

What Parents Think

Parents have different views about their adult children returning home. Many think they would only delay the adult child’s maturation and motivation for getting ahead. There is truth to their reasoning. Depending on the child and their reasons for coming home, some parents know they have no alternative but to say no. Many parents believe they have done their part as a parent, raised their children, put them through college so they can earn a decent living, and now it’s time they were on their own. They believe they owe the child nothing, and have done their part.

Many parents of adult children who are returning home want to help out. If they are coming home because of financial reasons, the parents hope that they will make a difference and help their child get a better start.

Some empty nesters don’t look forward to giving up the peace and comfort of living alone. Many do, however, to help their children. Some parents like their kids to live at home. They say it helps decrease the financial load and household responsibilities. Whether it’s a positive thing or not, there are things that should be discussed prior to your adult child moving back home. Good relationships are the result of good, clear communication. Expectations should be no surprise

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