Perhaps you lock eyes across a smoky bar. Or maybe a mutual friend introduces you at a party. A conversation ensues. She makes you laugh. He has a really nice smile. Before you part ways, you exchange numbers, promising to call.

Maybe you meet up once for drinks in the following weeks and talk on the phone a few times. Very casual, nothing too serious. You ask her to go out on a date with you and she agrees. A time and date are set and you already know the shirt you’re going to wear, but what to do and where to go are still up in the air.

There are many dos and don’ts when it comes to first dates. Here are a few choices that are sure to be a success and a few that should be avoided. If planned out, you may even get that coveted first kiss. Good luck.

Art in the Park

Every city, from Los Angeles to New York, has its share of outdoor art shows, state fairs, and local seasonal events. They can showcase everything from food to patchwork quilts to wind chimes. These events are weekly happenings in most towns once summer rolls around so check on-line for nearby listings.

All these outdoorsy events have a different feel, so choose carefully. A jazz festival in the park is going to smell a lot different than a state fair with a 4-H competition. What sounds like an antiques fair in a neighboring town may end up being a glorified garage sale.

Of course, wandering around these events is always free, but beware that some events have an entrance fee. The cost of food, if you do decide to dine there, can also be a bit pricey.

Attending one of these events is good for easy conversation, whether it’s for talking about the art hanging in the booths or people-watching. There is often entertainment in many forms; music, all types of how-to demonstrations, or booths to engage in making your own colored bottle of sand.

Bear in mind that these outdoor events are all based on the weather, so be sure to have a back-up plan in case of rain. And unless your date is a member of the Polar Bears’ Club, you’ll stay on her good side by keeping indoors if the weather is chilly.

Dinosaurs and Dioramas

If you haven’t graced the entrance of a museum since that 10th grade field trip, consider checking one out again. Perhaps it’s a bit nerdy (it certainly doesn’t hold the same sweaty appeal as a dance club) but it’s guaranteed to be quiet and more personal. If you’re the shy type, this could be better for more intimate conversation, as you won’t have to compete with the thump of the bass line. Museums have a constantly changing roster of special exhibits as well as their permanent collections. From gems to dinosaurs to mummies, a museum has a lot to offer for wandering.

In many big cities, museums are holding martini and IMAX nights, an unlikely combination that brings the younger set to museums on Friday and Saturday evenings.

Along the same lines, though a bit more lively, is an aquarium. On the weekends, you may have to fight with parents and their children but go later in the afternoon and the crowds will have thinned out.

Besides, those stone, low-lit corridors also offer a perfect, slightly secluded place for a first kiss.

Coffee or Beer?

The old stand-bys, it’s hard to go wrong with caffeine or hops. Both coffee and beer are a great place to meet up before embarking on your adventure together. Don’t make either place both your beginning and final destination for the evening. There’s nothing particularly unique or original about sitting in a booth all night, straining to be heard above the music and hacking through cigarette smoke.

Avoid bars or coffee shops that you frequent normally. There’s nothing worse than getting caught up in a conversation with a local and having your date staring at her fingernails, wondering how much longer she’ll have to wait for you.

Pick a bar or coffee shop in a neighborhood near a park or a bar with a garden out back. This offers up a different change of scenery and is always quieter than sitting inside.

What’s Sashimi?

It’s cool to know the difference between tapas and sushi. In fact, if you don’t know the difference, go pick up the food section of your paper and learn.

Restaurants open and close daily, meaning that there is inevitably some new (or maybe even old) place that neither you nor your date have been yet. Ask her what type of food she likes (or loathes) and make a reservation. Go on-line, or pick up a Zagat’s guide at a bookstore and peruse the options. The local burrito joint you frequent nightly down the street won’t suffice.

If you’re uncomfortable with something totally new, head to a nicer tried-and-true restaurant that lends itself to some intimacy and doesn’t require stepping over wadded up napkins to get to a table.

If it’s a place you’ve never been before, you run the risk of having a mediocre experience or eating some boring food. But you’re doing it together and it can always be joked about on your second date.

Need you be reminded to pick up the bill?

Take to the Woods

There are few more things more romantic than a picnic lunch on the beach or in the woods (bugs aside). Ask in advance what type of food she likes (sandwich type, type of cheese) and pack a picnic lunch, complete with a bottle of wine and take to the trail.

A hike is a bit more strenuous so be sure to ask if she’s up for a little off-roading. Some trails will lead to breathtaking overlooks worthy of sunset kisses and some lead to mosquito-infested creeks. Be sure to know your trail -- getting lost in the woods may not be conducive to getting a second date.

Assuming you live on a coast, the beach is an old stand-by. It could also be a good excuse to see her in a bathing suit. Be wary of sand in the food and pack a tablecloth.

Be sure to clue your date in as to what you’re doing; high heels don’t go well with sand or trails.

Once again, take note of the weather and have an alternate plan. A picnic lunch on your apartment floor with candles can also work.

Grapes vs. Hops

Liquor is involved in so many firsts that it’s not even worth mentioning. If you have the luxury of living near a brewery (not too hard to find) or a winery (a bit more difficult to come by), consider a tour of one of the facilities. While you will have to pay a fee for the tour, there will always be tastings involved that make it all worthwhile.

Granted, the whole tour mentality can be a bit school-like, so unless your date is really into the intricacies of introducing yeast into beer, you may want to want to run the idea by her first or plan something livelier for afterwards.

Many breweries and wineries now have restaurants where you can have food matched with the establishments different types of alcohol. That solves your restaurant dilemma.

Flex your Muscles

Never, ever, suggest a sporting event as a first date. Neither the sweaty guy sitting next to you with body odor nor the bad, overpriced food are intimate or attractive. There will be time for a baseball/hockey/rugby game later on if you see each other again. But to ensure that happens, avoid the arenas the first time around.

However, if you want to show off your deltoids, consider something a little less ‘sporty’ but with a slightly competitive edge: bowling or miniature golf. Granted, those bowling shoes are highly unflattering on anyone, but the whole endeavor can be hilarious, especially if neither of you are very good.

Miniature golf can invoke memories of junior high but still it is fun, good for laughs and sharing stories.

Steer Clear of….

Any outing with two people can be considered a first date. For that reason, avoid the following:

Movies: The whole point of going out on a date is to talk and get to know each other. The whole point of going to a movie is to keep your mouth shut and watch the screen. Of course, you then have ample fodder to discuss afterwards but the setting (though it is dark) doesn’t lend itself to getting to know someone. No one past the age of 18 makes out in movie theatres anyway.

Concerts: Though you may love Metallica and she thinks they’re righteous, once again, the whole arena scenario comes into play. The shouting, the long line for the bathroom, the elbow in the ribs, are not romantic nor are they fun. Hit the mosh pit with your best friend, not your date.

Parties: Attending a party requires knowing someone hosting the event. Perhaps it’s you, or maybe your date, or even both of you who knows the giver. Regardless, she will smuggled off by her friends to find out what’s going on between the two of you. If you know the person throwing the party, you have the tedious responsibility of introducing her to everyone and then dealing with the small talk. This is not enjoyable for anyone.

Your first date should be thought out if you want a second date. Don’t stress yourself out over mundane details -- just plan appropriately, have a back-up plan, and be flexible. If you end up at the end of the night fidgeting on her doorstep, you’ve done something right.