Moving Overseas

Moving overseas is not as easy as packing your bags and buying a one-way ticket to wherever your heart desires. Many of Americans would love to head out to an unknown land, picked like Cher's character in the movie Mermaids—by throwing a dart at a map and hoping for the best. But we are not in a Hollywood movie and we are bound by strict international laws that dictate who, what where, when, why and how we can relocate. Here are a few tips to help you decide if you're meant to be an ex-pat and at the same time keep on the right side of the law and culture in any corner of the world.

Get a Passport and Visa

Before anyone sets foot out of the country, you'll need a passport. A passport is recognized world-wide as an official form of national and personal identification for travel between countries. Americans can only get a passport from the US Department of State, however there are roughly 6,000 locations nation-wide that can process your information. You'll need 2 passport sized photos (can be taken at many photo shops and pharmacies), proof of your US citizenship, like a birth certificate, and lastly, a recent photo ID like a license. First time passport seekers will need to appear in person to apply, but if you are looking to renew a passport that is undamaged and in your possession you can reapply by mail. Both processes take about 6 weeks. For more information check out the US Department of State.

Once you get a passport,you will need a proper visa. The type of visa you will need is extremely important, and the requirements differ by country and by the purpose of your relocation. Make sure you do not get a tourist visa as you will likely be staying longer than the 30 days generally allowed by tourist visas. Different countries have different agreements with the USA. Generally speaking, you must first be hired and sponsored by a company located in the country you wish to move to. It is unwise to first move to a country. You won't be able to stay more than 90 days maximum as a tourist, and getting forcibly removed from a country is not the best way to become a thriving ex-pat. Each country will have its own qualifications, and those should be carefully scrutinized before buying a plane ticket. A simple web search for the consulate or embassy of the country you are looking at will provide you with all the information you need.

Local Laws and Customs

Familiarize yourself with local laws and customs. The worst thing that can happen to a new ex-pat is deportation because of a legal misunderstanding. For example, Singapore has strict laws and fines over everything from jaywalking and graffiti to chewing gum. Each can carry hefty fines and possibly a jail sentence or caning. (Remember the 1993 Michael Fay graffiti incident?) A good rule to follow is, if you are unsure about anything, don't do it. Most foreign countries consider people guilty until proven innocent, and the U.S. might not be able (or willing) to help you.

Being aware of local customs can be a good way to secure some alliances in your new home. Knowing the difference between the okay sign and profanity could strongly help with any of the obstacles you'll have to overcome to achieve any sense of normalcy. Many locals have been more than happy to assist me when I needed help, but they have only paid attention because I was able to offer some sign of respect. A simple bow or pleasantry in the native tongue has made me the lucky recipient of many a helping hand. Read up on things such as body language and ordinary courtesies and be aware of at least a few of the most common translations (hello, excuse me, I don't understand, etc…)

Find the Other Ex-pats

This step is best when done before you leave. That one person from home (or at least from an English speaking country) will likely be your most valuable resource. There are many good websites and foreigner-run magazines with contacts and articles meant to help you. Time Out © is a great source for everything from entertainment to classifieds and is found in most major cities. Don't forget, the web is loaded with information about travelers and suggestions. Reading all the travel guides in the world is a great start, but to find that perfect piece of pizza or a place to get a decent haircut, you might need a more current primary source.

Pack Light

Unless you've got thousands of dollars to spend, pack as little as possible. If you're not moving for more than a couple of years, I recommend leaving all valuable and sentimental items behind. Many foreigners find that once they get used to their new surroundings, they would prefer to relocate to a more familiar or convenient part of town. The less you have, the easier the move and the more you can accumulate from your subsequent travels.

Have a Plan

Why are you in this country? Knowing why you are there and having an attainable goal is a great way to make the most out of your ex-patriotism. Having a timeline is the best way to set realistic expectations. For example, when I moved to Japan, I had no idea how long I wanted to stay or what I had hoped to achieve out of my visit. It wasn't until I had been there for 8 months that I came up with a game plan. By that time, I was crunched for time to travel and had endured needless nights on an uncomfortable futon because I couldn't justify buying a cheap bed if I didn't know when I would leave. Had I set a manageable timeline for myself, buying things to make my apartment feel more like a home and less like a dorm room would have created a much more relaxed sojourn. Decisions you make early on can set the tone for your stay. Plans can always change, but so much more can be accomplished when you know what to expect.

Toss All Stereotypes and Expectations

Even in the most frequently visited countries that have close relations with the US, you are bound to experience culture shock. Daily life is far different from that we see on the news and in magazines. Living in a country is different than visiting and can be both rewarding and highly frustrating, especially if you don't speak the language. Having as few expectations as possible will allow you to see the country as it is, unbiased by a preformed opinion of your new homeland. No matter why you enter into the country, you are likely to experience many different emotions. For me and my friends, living abroad has conjured up several different reactions:

• Exuberance. The first, second and third months are generally pure excitement and enthusiasm. It's likely that you'll feel energized and ready to conquer the world. It is in this stage that you are most likely to take on too much and risk burn-out. Don't let your eagerness overshadow your objective. If you've moved to work, you should treat it as any other job. You'll be there for a long time and will have plenty of opportunity to explore and experience the culture.
• Paranoia.After the initial excitement wears off, a common feeling is that of isolation. Particularly if you move to a country where you stick out like a sore thumb, as I did in Japan, you will begin to imagine that everyone is looking at you, talking about you, or avoiding you. In reality, you might be an oddity to some who have few encounters with foreigners, but if you live in a major city, particularly in Europe, you won't be given a second glance. It is your own self-doubt of not fitting into a new culture that has gotten the best of you. It happens to most people, so just be aware of it and try not to let it affect your personal interactions. It is likely that no one cares that much about you anyway.
• Frustration. Around the six month mark, the routine starts to feel more concrete. You've successfully found your way around a completely foreign place, possibly causing the initial enthusiasm and wanderlust to dissipate. A job is a job, and you'll find that similar to your home country, you will be tired and stressed. The emotional, physical and mental consequences of being an outsider can add an unexpected dimension to the difficulties you might start to feel. Don't underestimate homesickness. It can manifest differently in everyone and if this is your first foray into another country, you could get hit hard. It might be around this time that a getaway or visit from a loved one can pull you out of your slump.
• Acceptance.This is the most difficult stage to achieve and it happens at different times for everyone. But rest assured, eventually you will find the peace of mind that will enable you to relax. You will always be a foreigner, but whether or not you are respected is up to you. A positive attitude and patience for the seemingly impossible are the only things that can make your ex-pat experience valuable.