I just can’t seem to admit that other women are attractive. Whether they are
on TV, the web, or in magazines, I just refuse to say, “Oh, yeah, she’s cute.”
I can’t stand it! I am so jealous, envious, that I can’t even confess that,
yes, I do believe another woman is pretty. In fact, I am a professional at
avoiding it. If my fiancé admits that another woman is attractive, which he
rarely does, I can feel my blood beginning to boil. I hate that feeling, but I
can’t stop it. I am an expert at analyzing and judging women physically, and
finding things that I believe are wrong with them. Pam Anderson has hepatitis
C, and thousands of dollars of plastic surgery. Men’s magazines are intensely
airbrushed. Jessica Simpson’s nose is too narrow; lips are too thin, etc. My
fiancé also admitted that he liked a certain type of women. I can’t stand
looking at them now, even though their features are a lot like my own. He
confessed once that a neighbor was cute, and I can’t stand the fact that they
talk to each other.
I am Not Alone
I know there are many other women who feel the same way I do, but I hate
feeling this way. He should be able to say another woman is attractive and I
should be comfortable with that. It should be okay. I know he loves me, and am
secure enough to know that he would never cheat on me. In fact, I trust him
fully. I know he finds me extremely attractive, he comments on it all the time.
So, how did I become so insecure? Where has my self-esteem gone? I don’t feel
that I am ugly, and am relatively comfortable in my own skin. I know as a child
I had great self-esteem. I can remember losing my self-esteem before I hit my
teen years. But why haven’t I regained it as an adult? Is the media to blame?
Is the plastic surgery industry at fault? Is it celebrities, models, or men
themselves? Maybe the women’s movement is to blame.
Responsibilities
No, all of those are false! I take responsibility for the way I feel. I
think women may have some sort of predisposition of becoming constantly
concerned with the way they look, especially in comparison to other women.
Where would the makeup, hair product, plastic surgery, nail product, jewelry
and clothing industry be without women? They would barely exist! Without women
on a constant hunt for something to make themselves look prettier, skinnier and
better, none of these industries would survive!
Why Must We?
What is this need to feel that we are physically superior to other women?
Why must we be seen in public with this faux mask on? Why can’t we just let
people see us the way we really look? The truth is that we really don’t look
that different without makeup on. So, why do we feel like we can’t go a single
day without it, or let anyone see us without it on? What are we trying to hide?
Is it not about the way we look at all? Is it about fear of aging? All of these
questions really lead to one bottom line: we do it because we are afraid of
something. What are you afraid of? I say, take a week, put away your makeup,
hair products, sexy clothes and let your true physical self be seen. Let that
person out. Are you up for the challenge?