Credit card companies aren’t in the business of customer service. They’re in the business of making money for credit card companies.

If customers pay their balances in full -- that is, never carry any portion into the next month -- the credit card company doesn’t earn interest on their accounts.

The companies find other ways, in the form of service charges and late fees, to encourage what has come to be called "revenue enhancement."

Don’t help them enhance their revenue. Start by opening your wallet or purse and taking out all your credit cards.

How many cards do you have?

If the answer is more than one, it’s too many.

The American family has, on an average, fourteen pieces of plastic on which debt can be accumulated.

Each month, I receive a half dozen or so credit card offers in the mail. I throw them in the fireplace unopened. One is all I need, and that’s how many I have.

Two cards means two bills, two accounts to manage, two payment deadlines to remember. Three cards means three of everything. And so on.

Credit card companies know that life is fragmented; that people work two, or three, jobs to survive; travel on business, have housefuls of kids to tend, are addicted to entertainment. That most can’t afford to pay business managers to keep their affairs in order. That a lot of them are simply disorganized. They’re betting that all the distractions will make people forget what their cards look like, let alone the due dates. The companies also know that many card holders are decent and honest Joes and Janes who will eventually pay up, late fee and all.

In 2002 there were 386 million active pieces of plastic with VISA on them. One in a hundred accounts (one per cent) past due is still 38.6 million. If only half of those accounts eventually pay up, Nineteen million times the twenty dollar late fee is . . . well, you get the picture.

In the second quarter of 2005, 4.81 per cent of credit card accounts in the United States were more than thirty days past due.

The credit card companies want you to have more cards. Don’t play their revenue enhancement game.

No wonder the VISA brand is on vanity credit cards depicting everything from scenic panoramas to puppy dogs to pro sports logos. (I don’t get it. I’d be embarrassed, after this baseball season, to pay for something with a Detroit Tigers credit card, officially licensed by Major League Baseball.)

The Rules

Even if you get down to one account and remember its due date, the rules can change in mid-game.

At one time, I could pay my bill by phone as late as fifteen minutes before midnight local time, on the due date printed on my statement.

As of July 2005, payments made after 4 PM local time are not posted until the following business day.

This reduction in service was noted at the bottom of my statement in a space reserved for "Important News."

People are creatures of habit and like to put things off, especially when bill paying is concerned. The credit card companies know that. They’re counting on you to, first of all, not read your statement thoroughly; and then, if they do, still make their automated payment at the same time they always do: the very last minute. Due date swing

Payment due dates can still fall on weekends and Monday holidays. (Don’t ask.) Plan ahead. Open your bill the day you get it. Don’t leave it sit on the kitchen table assuming that, if your due date was the 30th last month, it will be the 30th this month. I’ve seen due dates fall within a seven-day range (26th through 2nd of the next month). The number of days in a calendar month varies by only three. When I pointed this out to a customer "service" rep, and repeated for the fourth time my query re the date swing, she finally told me: "We don’t want people to know that." (I treasure that phone conversation.)

I believe payments made before 4 PM local time are also subject to some sort of operator-assisted penalty because the company’s automated payment system is now unable to process last-day payments. (More reductions in "service.") I "believe" since I've put this concern in the form of a yes or no question to four different customer "service" reps and have received two yesses and two nos. I think I’ll make it a best-of-seven.

The grace period

Attention, first-time credit card holders:

A credit card bill doesn't really have one.

If your car insurance policy payment is due on June 26th, for example, and you have a twenty day grace period, a payment received by July 16th will be processed, and your policy will still be in force. No harm, no foul.

Credit cards don’t work that way.

If my billing period ends on June 6th, the bill will arrive somewhere around the 10th. I have until the 26th to pay it. My twenty day grace period includes the days between the 6th and the 26th. Not after the 26 th due date.

So my credit card bill can be considered past due when I open it. If it arrives on the 10th, and payment is due on the 26th, my twenty day grace period is really sixteen days.

Don’t assume that a credit card bill’s grace period, like those for utilities and insurance, extends past the date printed next to the words DATE DUE. If you do, you’ll see the words LATE FEE on your next month’s statement.

Those handy checks

There they are, attatched to the bottom of your statement, practically shouting "use us!"

Cool, you think. My wife has the checkbook. I’ll just pay with one of these.

It’ll cost you about ten dollars, depending on the company, in the form of a mysterious debit on your next statement. You’ll have no idea what it is, even if you do examine every line item (something else the credit card companies are counting on you not to do) and find it.

Those handy checks? Do yourself a favor, and save a few bucks. Tear them off and put then in the fireplace with the unopened credit card applications.

The standard answer

"Read your member agreement."

Translation: get out a magnifying glass and try to figure out what all the vaguely worded tiny-print legalese means.

The credit card companies know that almost no one reads their member agreement, and that very few of those who do are lawyers.

The companies also assume, taking into account the skyrocketing percentages of people seeking credit counseling, and from the overall dumbing-down of the population in general, that the average credit card holder isn’t too bright, is incapable of managing their own finances, and couldn’t understand the member agreement even if they could read the six point font in which it’s printed.

I point out to the customer "service" people that, hey, I went to college -- graduated, in fact -- and I’m not stupid, I read the member agreement, I can’t find the information I’m seeking, and I’m asking YOU for some straight answers to a few simple questions. (And why am I not getting them?)

Credit 101

Right there on the credit card company web site’s home page. Credit 101. An assortment of tips re how to use credit responsibly. Condensed, they read: "Don’t live beyond your means."

Good advice, but a more consumer-friendly version of the list might include:

Fnd a scissors and cut in half every credit card with an NFL team logo or a picture of a country singer on it.

Don't apply for any more credit cards. Today, while revising this article, I had to stop and answer the phone. On the other end was someone trying to get me to do just that. Sorry, but there's something about someone speaking with a foreign accent offering me a General Motors platinum VISA that brings out the cranky in me.

Open your bill the day you get it and read every line on it. If there are still any service charges you don’t understand, give us a call and our customer service reps will give you all the information we allow them to give you. In other words, you’re still on your own.

Read what’s printed under the words IMPORTANT NEWS. Open every piece of mail you get from us, even if it looks like junk mail. Enclosed might be Important News that, in six months, payments made on odd-numbered days in months with an R in them won’t post until the next business day.

Know what our grace period really is. We won’t tell you, so you’ll have to figure it out yourself.

It will cost you ten dollars to use one of those "convenience" checks attached to your bill.

Go back to school and get that law degree that will allow you to read and understand your member agreement. On-line universities now make anything possible.