Raising children in today's society is not easy. The effects of TV and mass media have eroded our primal parenting instincts. It's time to get back to some parenting basics for raising kids that are emotionally and intelluctally well-adjusted and stable in an ever-changing world.
Unfortunately children don’t arrive with a user’s manual in hand and finding a balance between effective parenting versus the effects of the modern world can be tricky. The experts agree that most children need structure and a firm set of guidelines and rules to help them grow and adapt emotionally and intellectually.
In today’s society, it’s easy for parents to get off track with the daily demands of work and family. The influence of TV and the mass media can play havoc on a parent’s instinctive parenting skills. Parenting is a partially instinctive and partially learned skill. As parents, we based our parenting abilities on how we were raised but sometimes these methods are lost in the complexity of the modern world.
The key to effective parenting, whatever methods are utilized, is consistency. If you are not consistent in your values and expectations, your efforts will have little lasting effect on your offspring. If you hold tight to your convictions, but leave a little flexibility to adapt your values to new situations as they arise, your child will reap the benefits of your parenting know-how.
There are few simple but effective techniques you can initiate which will enhance your parenting skills and aid in your quest to raise healthy, adjusted and stable offspring.
Set a regular bedtime.
Children need plenty of sleep to help them grow strong and learn. Quite often, working parents will let their children stay up unreasonably late to spend more time with them. Limit these late nights to every other night. Child who get less then the recommended 10 - 12 hours of sleep nightly can experience difficulties in school. In addition, they may be cranky and uncooperative
Sit down to dinner as a family as often as possible.
In this hurried world, it’s easy to throw something in the microwave and eat while watching TV. Remember it’s not the microwave dinner that’s the problem, it’s the TV. Make TV off limits during dinnertime and use this time to talk with your child.
Set limits and boundaries.
We live in a world where we must follow rules and boundaries. Your household should be no different. How will a child learn to follow the law, if they weren’t taught to follow simple rules as children? Lay out consequences for undesirable behavior and post them in full view.
Take time for yourself and your spouse.
Even the best parents need time to rejuvenate. Plan an evening out with just you and your spouse. Get your child use to the idea of having a regular baby-sitter. The younger your child is when you start hiring a baby-sitter, the easier it is on everyone concerned.
Read to your child everyday.
Statistics show that children, who are read to daily, excel academically. Read to your child from a very young age and encourage them to read every night when they are old enough to read for themselves
Give your child a solid religious foundation.
Due to a diverse culture, many schools no longer offer a religious program. Religion starts at home. Say prayers before meals, attend church regularly, and enroll your child in Sunday school. Don’t be drawn into the notion that child should choose their own religion when they are older so why enforce your beliefs on them as children? Let your child know what religion you practice and teach them your beliefs. When they reach adulthood, they can decide what’s right for them.
Be available to your child.
There’s more to parenting than being a visible body around the house. Get involved in your child’s life. Play games, read books, go for walks. Spend time one-on-one with each child doing something that’s exclusive to that child. If one child likes to go to the library but the other doesn’t than make this your special together time.
Apologize when you’re in the wrong.
It takes a big person to apologize so be that big person if the opportunity arises. By apologizing when you’re in the wrong, your child will realize that adults can make mistakes also.
Teach your child by example.
A child who is raised in an atmosphere where swearing is commonplace will see nothing wrong with swearing. Good parenting doesn’t go by the motto - do as I say not as I do. Good parenting is practicing what you preach.
Teach your child that’s its OK to have quiet time.
Let your child see you reading, resting, and just enjoying family and friends. Teach your children that life doesn’t have to be a merry-go-around of activity every minute of the day. Remember even God rested on the seventh day.
Instill a sense of empathy in your child.
If your child is hurtful, use role-playing to demonstrate how it feels when hurtful words or actions are used. Teach your child that words can be just as hurtful as hitting. Statistics show that children who have a sense of empathy are less likely to be involved in criminal activity.
Promote healthy eating and exercise habits.
New studies cite statistics that obesity amongst children is reaching epidemic proportions. Furthermore, another study revealed that obesity can result in learning difficulties. Encourage your child to be active, respect food and make healthy food choices. Don’t just dictate, instead participate, join in and get fit too.
Appreciate your child for their own uniqueness.
Your child may be entirely different from you, learn to adapt to their world no matter how diverse it is from yours. If you’re sports-orientated and your child is creative, make an effort to engage in activities that interest your child even if they aren’t to your preference. Years from now, your child will appreciate the effort you made to understand them and their world. Remember to introduce your child to things that interest you also so they can learn to appreciate all the world has to offer.
Don’t try to be your child’s friend.
You are the parent. Your child needs a parent to guide them into adulthood, actions speak louder than words - act accordingly.