Well, don’t panic. You don’t have to dump them right away – this is not a boyfriend/girlfriend situation, it’s a weed-out process.
Here’s how you decide who needs to go:
Decide what friend makes you feel worse instead of better. You know, always has something negative to say about your hair, your clothes, your family.
Notice who you hesitate to pick up the phone for.
Figure out what friend you feel exhausted after seeing – they drain you of your joy, secrets, and can-do spirit.
Starting to recognize these faux friends? Time to say good-bye – slowly.
Here’s how:
Everytime your negative friend says something cruel to you, end the conservation at that moment. If you’re on the phone, tell them you have another call. If you’re at lunch, "remember" an appointment you forgot. When this "friend" loses their opportunity to put you down, it’s a sure bet they’ll lose interest in you, too!
If there’s someone you don’t want to speak with on the phone, that’s a strong indicator that there’s something better you should be doing with your time. So, once you get their message, wait a day before returning their call. Next time, wait two days, and so on. Without even knowing they’re being dumped, you’re friend will find other people to call!
If you feel tired after seeing someone, this person is draining your valuable resources that you need to make other friends! So, with this person, become a Polite Plan Breaker. Break your plans a day before they’re supposed to happen. Do it politely and wait for them to say they want to reschedule. Put off the reschedule for at least a week and then go. Avoid making plans for at least two weeks after that, cancel, then postpone for another two and so on. Before you know it, you’ll be seeing less of this draining friend, not more!