Before you start your new homework-help program, plan a routine that you will
be able to follow every day. Like all children, adolescents do better with a
routine that is predictable. If your twelve-year-old knows that you are going to
ask for his planner at 4:00 every afternoon, he's less likely to start a fight.
When you plan your homework routine, include the following:
Discuss what your child needs to do that day,
Monitor your child's organization,
Ask if there are assignments your child needs extra help with,
Ask what long-term projects or tests are coming up, and
After homework is done, check over it briefly for accuracy and
completeness
Before you start applying your new routine, let your child know when you will
start and what you'll be doing. If you think your child will be resistant,
explain that you're doing this to help avoid the fights you usually have. Say
something like, "I know we usually get into fights about homework, and we both
hate having them. Tomorrow we'll start having a quick meeting every day after
school. I'm going to ask you to show me your planner and ask if you need my help
on any assignments, then I'm going to walk away. You can check back when you're
done or if you need help."
Once you've begun a homework routine, try it for two weeks without changes.
It may take you and your adolescent that long to adjust. After you've tried the
routine for two weeks, you'll know if you need to make changes. Maybe you'll
need to monitor organization after the homework is completed, or wait half an
hour to ask if your help is needed. As long as you are consistent, it's OK to
make some adjustments.
Promote Independence
The goal of helping your adolescent with homework is not to make sure he or
she gets a good grade on a particular assignment—a better goal is to help your
child learn how to do well on assignments without your help. Keep that goal in
mind as your child works through a difficult task or brings home a low grade on
a report card.