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Life After Infidelity: Learning to Love and Trust Again 
 
by Miss "M" August 31, 2005

You've left him.....Now what?

After some time passes and the divorce finalizes, you see fit to get back out there. Carefully, you step out with friends and each person who approaches you is a potential lover. Things are different this time. There is a child involved. The child has been through enough so the decision to date is hard enough without bringing someone new home so quickly. Dating proves to be fun and after a while, you feel you have found "the one". He's sweet, generous, loving and he really is great with your child. He's been hurt too so he's also cautious and wants the real deal, not to be friends with benefits. (By the way, the "benefits" are FANTASTIC!!) This is the guy you should have married the first time.

I love you, but I don't trust you

As the two of you become serious, things change from a trust standpoint. What used to be unconditonal trust has manifested itself into you snooping through your new love's belongings. You seriously do not want to find the one thing to break up this happy union, but you use whatever it is that you find against him and cause a fight. He's confused. He's angry. He wants to know what came over you that made you look through old letters in a box covered in dust. What was so important that you had to use letters written 5 years ago before you met him into a big deal? Was it the fact that he still had them? The case could have been that he forgot all about those. Now he doesn't trust you. He begins to plant things all over just to see if you'll snoop....and you do.

Getting past the problem and finally moving forward

Time does pass and the obsession with the evil lying, cheating ex does go away. You can live a happy life after infidelity. No one says it is easy, but the fact that you are reading this is proof. I did it, so can you!

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