“Mom, the lady just doesn’t like me!” “Its not fair, he’s always on my case.” Teachers are responsible for many children at
one time. Often students feel they have
been slighted when a teacher seems to pass them over for rewards, compliments
or privileges. Students often mistake
imagined slights, as signs that the teacher “doesn’t like me.” While most are
highly professional, sometimes a teacher and a student really don’t get
along.
As adults we naturally work harder for the
boss we like than the one we despise. Children are the same. They will withhold
their best efforts from a teacher they feel dislikes them. If your daughter isn’t doing her homework,
ask about the teacher.
“Do you
think he’s picking on you?”
“Why
don’t you think she likes you?”
If your son complains about a teacher,
politely meet with the woman and express your concerns. Enter with an open
mind. As one principal tells parents at
open house, “If you believe only half of what your children say about their
teachers, we’ll only believe half of what they tell us about their
parents!”
And, if the problem persists? Bring your concerns to the school’s
administration. Parents are often afraid
to report conflicts with a teacher, fearing retribution against their
child. In fact, the opposite is
generally the case. Teachers want their
students to succeed. It makes them look
good. Besides, just like students, teachers dread being called to the
principal’s office.
Inappropriate Placement
Just as in Garrison Keiller’s Lake Woebegone, we all like to believe
that our children are “above average.”
But sometimes the are not, and no amount of wishing, prodding or
punishing is going to make any difference.
If a child struggles consistently, if even with assistance they simply
can’t keep up with assignments, he may be improperly placed. Children who are bored, ignore assignments as
well. If work is too repetitive or not challenging enough, she may decide it is
not worth doing. Whether his third-grade
reading group, her middle school math class, or his high school honors program,
listen to your child’s complaints and monitor the amount of time spent on
homework. If work consistently takes too
long, is too hard, or too easy, contact the school.