Sometimes it’s hard to strike up a conversation when the questions you’re asking only require a one-word answer. To avoid hearing “yes” or “no” all the time and stimulate conversation, ask open-ended questions; for example, instead of, “Do you like this music?” you could ask, “What do you think of this band?” As a general rule, any questions beginning with “Are you,” “Do you,” “Will you,” or “Can you” invite short answers, so remember that when you’re preparing to initiate a dialogue.
Take advantage of the power of touch.
Obviously you shouldn’t throw an arm around someone, grab them obnoxiously or otherwise grope an unsuspecting victim, but a little touching can work wonders. If you’re in a loud, crowded place and it’s difficult to hear, lean forward and rest your hand very lightly on the other person’s arm when he or she is trying to talk to you. Or “accidentally” reach for the same item at the same time when you’re shopping, brushing the person’s hand in the process. If you’re sitting side by side, try putting your knee close enough to touch theirs, or sit shoulder-to-shoulder. If the person is uncomfortable and feels you’re invading their personal space, they’ll pull away, so be sure to watch for those types of signals and back off if necessary.
Pay attention.
It’s very important when talking to someone that you show that you’re interested in what they have to say. Cock your head slightly to the side, watch their eyes and mouth as they talk, and nod once in a while. Ask questions about the topic at hand. Glazing over and staring off into the distance with a bored “mm-hmm” every now and then is not the way to win someone over.