Homework time often turns into a battle when parents expect their adolescents
to do things the way parents would do them. Allowing kids some degree of freedom
will make them feel like they have control.
Let Kids Choose the Time
Many parents feel like kids should do their homework right when they come
home from school, and won't allow leisure time until all of the homework is
done. That works well for some families. Other kids, though, can't sit and focus
on homework until they've given their brains a break. If your child wants to
start homework after an hour of play, or after dinner, that's OK. Work together
to come up with a homework start time that will give your adolescent enough time
to complete all of his or her homework, still getting to bed on time.
Let Kids Choose the Environment
Adolescents often want to do their homework in strange places, like in the
tree house or on the living room floor. If you spent good money on a proper desk
that's not being used, try hard to bite your tongue. Your son or daughter will
work better if he or she is comfortable.
Some children like to drive their parents crazy by listening to music while
they're doing homework. Don't give in to the temptation to require your child to
turn the music off—some children actually work better with music playing. Allow
the music, but not the TV—it's too distracting for any learning style.
Be Positive
No amount of routine or organization will curb homework arguments if the
parents act in negative ways or say negative things. Even if your adolescent is
angry and resentful, stay positive in your words and actions. Children,
including adolescents, are extremely sensitive to negative words, and need your
praise far more than your criticism.
Helpful, positive comments:
I see that you are working really hard on this.
Your teacher wrote a really nice comment here!
Thank you for keeping your backpack organized.
Your math grade is really improving!
You did a great job of getting right to work today.
If you keep studying this hard, you're sure to ace the test.