Finding out six months after the wedding that your new spouse wants to start on a family right away (we’re not getting any younger, and having six children can take time.) while you’re still adjusting to the idea of getting a dog (you mean we have to walk it everyday?) can be discouraging. The solution to avoiding this problem, of course, is to talk, talk, talk. Talk about how many kids you’d like and how soon. Will one of you stay home with the children or will you both continue to work? It’s even helpful to discuss your philosophy on parenting and discipline (if you have one.) Come to some form of agreement on the issue of children before you say, “I do.”
Talking with your intended about these issues before you head down the aisle can mean the difference between a rocky first few years together and smooth sailing in marital bliss. Professional pre-marital counseling is often a good way to talk about these issues, and others, before the big day, but if you or your partner isn’t ready to sit down with a professional just yet, at least talk about these issues yourselves. Together, you can work out some of the classic conflict-makers in marriage before your marriage even begins.