Silence is (a) GOLDEN (OPPORTUNITY)! It would seem that silence would
be an enemy in an interview. Long, empty spaces in a conversation, when no-one
talks and the tape is going around and around are frightening to the neophyte
interviewer. Make silence your friend. The key is to remember that your
informant doesn't like them either. You can train yourself to wait them out. You
ask a question and your grandfather is silent. Don't panic. It may mean he's
thinking, or he's not sure how much he wants to tell you, or whether he wants to
say anything at all. The best way to make sure he does is to put your teeth
together, keep your lips closed, keep eye contact (smile if you can and its
appropriate—not if you're talking about a funeral) and WAIT…and WAIT…and WAIT.
Nine times out of ten, people can't stand the silence, and what comes out when
the silence is broken can be very emotional and deep stuff. This is the mother
lode of memory. (Make sure that it is not YOUR memories that break this
silence…WAIT!) This technique is based in psychotherapy so don't overuse it. You
are not a doctor. Remember the first rule: the welfare of your informant is your
FIRST consideration.