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I Want to Live with Daddy: Custody Changes and your Child 
 
by Jami Cameron July 12, 2005

And a few what not to do’s

When faced with the stress of your child’s desire to live with the other parent, there are a few things you should always avoid, or you may ostracize yourself from your child for good:

  • Never tell your child that if they live with the other parent, they will never see you again – that is just plain dirty and can even be considered mentally abusive.
  • Don’t ignore your child’s desire to move in with the other parent and hope they will just get over it – doing so may cause your child to quit opening up to you – something that can lead to bigger issues in the future.
  • Never tell your child how worthless or irresponsible their other parent is – if they are irresponsible your child will realize that on their own – it’s not your place to degrade the other parent.
  • Avoid guilt trips at all costs – yes, it may break your heart, and you can let your child know that you will have to grow accustomed to not having them around on a full-time basis– but that sort of manipulation will eventually build up resentment and your child will see it as a control tactic, which may strain your relationship in the future.
  • Don’t allow your child to live with the other parent to teach them a lesson – do it for the right reasons.
  • Never allow your child to live with a parent who is unfit, no matter the circumstances – if you know that the other parent is engaged in illegal activities or a lifestyle not conducive to raising a child – then as a responsible parent, you must override the child’s decision to live there.

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