When you’re in a new relationship, you spend extra time on your appearance so your beloved won’t notice your cowlick or your saddlebags. You’re so attracted to each other’s looks that you can hardly keep your hands off of one another. Then, once the newness wears off and you’ve been in the relationship for a while, you dare to take your makeup off or bare your ugly feet in the other’s presence. And then it gets really bad – the years go by, and suddenly you’re doing “number two” with the bathroom door open and asking your sweetie to pluck stray hairs out of weird places – things you never would have dreamed of doing in the beginning, lest your lover find you less attractive.
There’s a lot to be said for reaching that level of extreme comfort with someone. But at the same time, it’s important not to completely let yourself go one hundred percent of the time. Losing your physical attraction to your mate can cause serious problems, because like it or not, this type of attraction is a big factor in relationships. When you aren’t attracted to your partner any more, it’s like a domino effect: your sex life suffers, your partner’s self-esteem suffers, you withdraw, and bam! – there are problems.
Inevitably, our looks will change as the years go by because of aging, kids, and so on. But regardless of the toll that time takes on you, do your best to keep yourself attractive for your mate. Keep your body in reasonable shape and try out a different hair style once in a while. If there’s a particular outfit that you know your partner likes you in, wear it sometimes. As long as the demands aren’t unrealistic – such as looking twenty when you’re actually forty-five – maintaining your looks can help keep your relationship fresh.